I was advising a toddler the other day on a definitive set of things she and her man love should do to conform to all the cheesy love norms. Come on. It doesn't matter how mature you are or how often you pass snide remarks abt those gooey couples on the road - at some point you have to be a part of the system yourself. You HAVE TO do all the acts of love that'll embarrass you on a reminiscing spree five years later and make you squirm in saccharine disgust. So I looked back into my own past and that of several other lovey couples that I've known closely and assembled this list of MUST-DOs that every cheesy couple should do at least once:
1. Have nick names for each other: That's a must. You might be gifted with names as gallant and smooth as Vikram and Sneha, but to each other you have to be Toto and Tuti. The names have to be so imbecilely in content that you'll feel coy to even mention it to any adult beyond the age of five. A simple rule of thumb always helps - the closer your name comes to resembling a pet dog, the closer to that red spot in the target sheet you are. Remember!
2. Hanging up the phone should be a pain: Never just say "Bye, love you ..." and put down the telephone. Prolong the conversation for ages. Add in "I'll miss you ... Come to my dreams ... Naaah! I don't want to hang up ... You first ... Ok! Now you say it again ..." Continue this routine till the telephone company informs your dad of potential bankruptcy and then you know that you've done it right.
3. Hand made gifts: Ok! There are people who specialize in making good gifts that can be put to good use. Most of these gifts are affordable and useful. So what? Forget the expertise of all these gift makers and plunge into the bandwagon yourself. Every cheesy couple has to gift each other hand made gifts at some point. Forget the Hallmark cards that are well made, funny, affordable and worth treasuring - make one yourself. Smear your brown lipstick on a piece of paper and draw perverted cartoons and chip in a badly written love ballad where you searched three hours for a word that rhymed with "darling" and finally ended with "Your love's more precious than two hundred and fifty sterling". Yeah! That's what I'm talkin abt!
I can think of many more examples but right now my wife is in a mood of pampering me as a very sizzling aroma of paneer bhurji is coming out of the kitchen and I shall therefore stop and probably try to write more on this some other time.
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2 comments:
hey really cute examples u got there...what i was more interested in was the paneer bhurji u were bout to have;-)
well the bhurji was worth very molecule of it.... albeit the quantity was quiet less, which made me ponder there has always been a dearth of things i like the most in my life....now, now, now before i start complaining, let me remind myself that after all i am a human being & more importantly...' i am in Lau ' :-))
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